are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I wish i was in the wii world.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
How's work?
Spinning.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize