I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
