We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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