you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
