haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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