Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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