Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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