Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
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