so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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