If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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