You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize