as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
