At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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