We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
How's work?
Spinning.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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