The best revenge is premature balding
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
