just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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