Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
