Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
We just shotgunned beers for America
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
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