I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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