Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
