on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize