so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
