Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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