im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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