If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize
