redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
