Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
