Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
