i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
