Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
