I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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