yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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