Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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