i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
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