I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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