It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
