I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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