what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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