I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
As shirtless as possible
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
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