so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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