yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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