Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
