I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
