hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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