On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
wow bdsm is so cute
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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