Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
