the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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