I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Your dad touched me again.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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