If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize