Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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