Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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