can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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